Words to use: Robin, Veil, Saucer
A veil of secrecy shrouded the saucer landing. Flocks of robins evacuated the area when they heard the sonic boom that accompanied its re-entry into our atmosphere.
Homeland Security arrived an hour later. Three large men approached the saucer-like object, and knocked on what appeared to be a door. They were instantly vaporized, disappearing in a noiseless flash of chartreuse smoke. This news was immediately transmitted to Washington, where an emergency meeting of the Joint Chiefs was held. Someone from the State Department was also present, to make sure that none of our treaties with residents of other galaxies were broken. Of course, the Republican-led crew of Commanders did not believe in life outside our planet. They thought it was the Russians, but wisely kept this to themselves.
Homeland Security refused to sacrifice additional personnel, and thought the new group should be Marines. After all, didn’t Marines secure foreign areas for other forces?
“Not us,” said the Marine representative. “It’s domestic, and should be handled by the National Guard.”
“Not us,” the National Guard officer replied. “Congress denied our requests for lasers and neutron-bomb-resistant suits. Something about constitutional rights. I think NASA should handle it. Send three women in space suits, with a dozen donuts. That ought to seem friendlier to the aliens than three guys with lasers.”
A brief hum of murmurs filled the room, broken by, “Let’s break for lunch until 2:30.”
Satellites with powerful cameras, and the latest radio detection devices, were put in place, to focus our latest technologies on our alien visitors. News stations quickly dispatched teams of reporters and photographers who parked as close to the saucer as they were allowed by the FBI agents who were now in charge of the scene. Once they were in place, millions of Americans watched the saucer on every channel – including PBS, that sent Mr. Wizard Junior to cover the event.
Spectroscopes analyzed video images, but were unable to determine the composition of the saucer’s shell.
At 3:30, America’s Emergency Brain Trust reassembled in a secret room beneath the Pentagon. The red phone rang while they were taking their seats, and it was quiet. “Yes sir,” was spoken by the leader, who then addressed the group:
“The saucer has left. This meeting is over.”
Homeland Security received an additional trillion dollars in research and development funding the following day.
- January 22, 2010